The True Genius at Apple

Apple Genius Bar Logo

Not sure why Apple’s “Genius Bar” logo has an archaic, pre-quantum mechanics version of a lithium atom on it… but whatever. Seriously: wouldn’t “geniuses” get this right?

[genius is pain]
Once upon a time (like in 1984), Apple claimed you were the genius of your computer:

Nowadays (like in 2012), Apple claims you need a genius to operate your computer:

This is what happens when you overuse a word: you render it meaningless.

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We Need to Protect Ourselves

Victorinox Swiss Army Knife for a keychain

This is a 2-1/4 inch Swiss Army knife known as the “Classic”. It’s small enough to get lost among the keys on your keychain. You are not allowed to bring this tool into government buildings because it has a small knife on it with a cutting edge of just over 1 inch.

[happiness is a warm gun]
I have but one question to all the politicians (who, as it happens, are mostly Republican) now saying we need more armed citizens with vigilante attitudes to keep society safe:

Why won’t you let me carry a gun into your office building?

Heck, why won’t you even let me carry a key chain penknife into your office building?

Okay.  I admit it.  I had two questions.  Just wondering how you can feel safe in your building knowing that the average citizen isn’t packing?

Okay.  Three questions.

How to Purge Gay Members from the Boy Scouts

Boy Scouts of America's symbol: the fleur de lis

What could be more American and more masculine than an American Bald Eagle with a spike out of its head? So why did the Boy Scouts of America put the eagle (and spike) over a fleur-de-lis thereby encouraging generations of gay boys to sign up?

[be prepared]
The Boy Scouts of America just reiterated their strict no-tolerance policy on having gay members.  They apparently had a two-hour review — with review panel members’ identities being kept secret. Why can’t these panelists come out of the closet?

After all, a 19-year-old Eagle Scout just did.  He must have remembered that the very first part of the Scout Law says to be trustworthy.  And you have to honor this guy for being truthful: “I’m gay”.  I’m assuming he had his Japanese merit badge because the first response from the Boy Scouts of America was “sayonara”.

But this really begs the question:  how the hell did a gay person pass through all those levels of scouting to attain the highest level of Eagle Scout, without being found out?  This is a very difficult rank to achieve: only 2% of all scouts get there.

King Louis XIV of France and the Fleur de Lis

King Louis XIV of France is the prototype Eagle Scout for the Boy Scouts of America. Note the long wig, high heels, and ubiquitous fleurs-de-lis on his robe. Note, too, the large sword that he used to whittle his Pinewood Derby car.

The Boy Scouts have to start by taking a good look at why they are even attracting gay members.  Let’s begin with their symbol.  It’s the fleur-de-lis, literally meaning the “flower of the lily.”  Flower of the lily?  Ummm…  gay!  So right off, we have a problem.  And of course, who is most known for the use of this symbol?  The French court.  French?  Gay!  Seriously, the French court is where they invented the idea of men in wigs and pumps.  Gay and gay!

Now let’s examine the merit badges the Boy Scouts offer.  Remember, these are activities that, by definition, the Boy Scouts encourage. Looking down this list, there are plenty of nice, safe activities for a wholesome American boy to take part in:  Camping, Backpacking, Truck Transportation, Nuclear Science (we still need A-bombs to defend the country!), Crime Prevention (what a nice way to label alcohol and tobacco as gateway drugs), Engineering, American Business (not those socialist European business models!), even Whitewatering.  You get the idea.  Things that gay boys wouldn’t at all be interested in.

But have a closer look.  We also have merit badges on Art, Basketry, Pottery, and Theater.  Basketry?  That’s no activity for Continue Reading

Schrodingers Equation for Quantum Mechanics

Backlash is a Bitch – or – An Apple is Bitten

Schrodingers Equation for Quantum Mechanics

This simple, nonlinear equation describes quantum mechanics in terms of the probability wavefunction, psi. Don’t worry if it doesn’t make sense, it’s all Greek to me as well. Or at least the bit about the wavefunction. h, m, V, i, and t are Latin letters.  I think.

[either or]
Earlier this week, this blog exposed the current top 3 lies in the United States.  Much has happened since then, it’s as if we need a faster form of the Internet to keep up. However, fear not, faithful reader (yes, both of you!).  I, your ever ready and trusty blogger, will keep you current — even if the stories move faster than the speed of light.  So here is an update on that post.

Gov Mitt Romney continues to be the Schrödinger’s Cat presidential candidate you first read about here.  (When you hear this phrase on The Daily Show or The Colbert Report, you’ll know where it originated from.  That’s assuming you can hear it on either of those two shows since Viacom recently shut down full episode Internet streaming of them.)  Gov Romney now is on record as both running and not running Bain Capital between the period 1999 to 2002.

If only George Orwell had been more aware of quantum mechanics, I’m sure he would have used something like it in his book, 1984.  Actually, he did:

“How can I help seeing what is in front of my eyes? Two and two are four.”
“Sometimes, Winston. Sometimes they are five. Sometimes they are three. Sometimes they are all of them at once. You must try harder. It is not easy to become sane.”

Moreover, instead of collapsing into one of the quantum states he has available (running or not running — that is the question!), Gov Romney is now using the “liar, liar, pants on fire” defense… once again turning the GOP into the Party of Pee Wee Herman.  (And yes!  You heard that here first as well!)

As for the largest tech corporation in the world?  Well, this week Apple had a quantum mechanical date also.  Or didn’t.

You can never be certain with quantum mechanics.

After pulling out of the green electronics (EPEAT) standards earlier in the week, Apple claimed it was doing better than those standards.  One would think, however, that if they were doing better, then they would automatically satisfy the EPEAT standards.  (Another quantum mechanical logic conundrum.)

Well… today, Apple is back on the EPEAT standards.  Wonder why?  Perhaps it’s because San Francisco actually followed their own buying guidelines and were not willing to purchase Apple products.  Perhaps Apple finally found the limit of where their enthusiasts fanbois would draw the line.  Whatever the reason, Apple reversed itself.  You have to marvel at this throw-the-spaghetti-on-the-wall approach to corporate policy.  Even without Retina Display, Apple could see what was sticking to the wall: nothing.

Sure would be nice if there were a bit of logic and consistency from both Gov Romney and Apple, wouldn’t it?  Rather than deal with all this quantum mechanical uncertainty?

Psi.

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